Guest Post by Rhonda Williams
I have for many year now written journals of my life and its many ups and down to life in that moment. I thought by writing my thoughts it would help me understand and find a way to find out the Why? As I write each page in my journal, it is like living all over again the abuse and violence that followed me around from one day into the next.
I came from a childhood of upset and pain being abused by those that should have shown me love. As I grew up schooling was far from better: bullied and made fun of. At 18yrs I left home and never went back again. Then came the working life that yet again those that I went to school with became my bullies in the work place.
I then got married. After 7 years and 3 sons later, after the abuse and violence, the end came and I got out. I then married again with another son born and blow me if it did not happen again. The abuse and violence mentally finished me and now with 4 sons, life started over again.
All these journals I have now destroyed, they are the past that I do not want in my life now and as I discovered by keeping them it meant that they were still in the now with me. Over the last few months I have taken time out of work to find me and slowly I have discovered that my life experience had mirrored my life and kept coming back in some form or other. My letting go of the past and forgiving all those that hurt me has helped me turn the page into more of the now and live in the moment that I feel so much better in me and around me. Sleeping much better too. I am at peace with me and am grateful for this moment.
My journal is now my life and is so much better. I am finding me as if I have been born again and love life. Of the many books that I have bought over the many years and read, by far the best is "Time to Write to Yourself" by Dianne Sandland. Little by little, my Diary writing changes into the Journal's of a better moment of happy times and smiles.
I have found my smile again.
About Rhonda Williams
I was born in Oxfordshire UK, brought up by my grandparents and have four sons and eight grand children. I still live in the Oxfordshire area in a lovely home with an office where I do all my writing and journal work. I am a Credit Controller by profession and a qualified Pharmacy Dispenser that in this moment I am having time out for me. Writing is to help me to understand and deal with the going forward positively. I have found that writing is a better way to express my thoughts. The written words have a more powerful meaning with the greater power to express with feelings.
What I want to achieve now is peace of mind and if I can help others in my written work then I have achieved something great now.