Bruce L. Bair Physician’s Assistant and Wellness Coach, interviewed me for his radio show, “Ask an Expert Anything.” This interview aired November 4th and I’ll publish excerpts of the transcript in several parts, edited for readability.
In this segment, Bruce and I talk about how therapeutic journaling specifically benefits middle-aged women experience changes in their bodies and lifestyles.
B: Bruce Bair M: Mari L. McCarthy
B: You know, one of the groups of people that I'm working with right now is Women in Menopause, because there's so many things going on with them as they go through this process of physical change from, I guess, fertility to natural infertility and the body changes. And one of the things that can change is the way they think and feel about themselves and this would be a really good way for them to deal with all these different feelings, and thoughts, and emotions, and changes. Have you had any menopausal clients that you've worked with at all in that regard?
M: I would say that the majority of my clients are, shall I say, women of a certain age. They are ladies that are in their 50s who are going through the change and it’s, "Oh, what do I do now? Where do I go?" and “Who am I?” so it's really a good opportunity for them to start therapeutic journaling, Journaling for the Health of It! TM.
Because with a woman, with the kids, the hormones and things like that, it's just like, "Oh, what's going on in my body?” The hot flashes and night sweats -- I mean, that's all part of the natural process. Yes, there are some women that have very severe things that you do really need some medical attention for, but by-and-large, it's really a further understanding of your body and your mind.
Reconnect with your body, and your buried treasures
B: It just occurred to me, you know, I hadn't thought about that, but one of the problems is, is that they feel disconnected from their own bodies…
M: Yes.
B: … and I think some of that is that they've been so busy mothering and working, and, you know, doing and putting themselves last that they really are disconnected and all of a sudden the body starts sending them signals with, "Hey, I'm here, you know, you're living in me." You know? Start paying a little bit of attention.
M: And I think too, as you said earlier, the body speaks to us, and it speaks in terms of you get headaches, sinus infections, menopause. And it's just a natural part of what the body… and it's the body's way of attempting to get our attention. Like you say, “I'm here, I've been here X number of years. How about that? Let's sit down and chat and get reacquainted with each other.”
B: You know, (middle-aged women are) going through more than one kind of change: physical changes and then the changes in empty nest, and they usually reach a point in their career where they're usually on top of their career, if they've been a career woman. They can see the end of the career over the horizon, so I think all those things would make journaling a very, very valuable tool for them and a valuable piece of time they would spend every day. I need to direct some of my patients this way.
M: Well, it's just interesting. Just today, I saw a client and her comment to me was she's been journaling now for I guess about six months. She's probably mid 50s and she just came out, and she said, "You know, after doing all this journaling, I'm enjoying me, me, me and making my life about me, me, me and I'm not feeling guilty or bad or anything. I'm really enjoying talking about and living my life for me."
Like I said, it's so exciting to reconnect and just really get back to who we were, a long time ago in a galaxy far away when we came into this world. All those talents, strength, creativity… It's all there.
B: Right. You don't know what you're going to do with them, but it's never too late to awaken those things, and so they can enrich your life and so that you can feel better about yourself. And that's what it sounds like. That lady, you know, she doesn't sound like she was being selfish at all. It sounds like maybe up until she started journaling she didn't feel like it was okay. Now she has permission.
“Self-care is the most unselfish thing you can do”
M: There's a line from a Broadway song that I like and the character says, "I'd be the first one to agree that I'm preoccupied with me." And that's what people are… ladies, and I do have a couple of gentleman clients, are comfortable…just to get into themselves and they say, "Oh wow! This is fun, and the idea of talking about me, me, me. It's a good, positive thing.”
B: Yeah, it is a good, positive thing. Because one of the things I teach my clients is, is self-care is the most unselfish thing you can do. If you take good care of yourself, you have abundance overflowing then, and you have plenty for everybody else rather than trying to conserve what you feel like can't be replaced. You know, you have to regenerate you, and then you overflow…It sounds like these people are experiencing that for the first time in their life.
M: Oh, it is. It's interesting now. I've gotten to the point where with my clients I can tell if they have not been journaling consistently…by the tone of their voice and what they're saying or how they're saying it. It's great to see, you know, the lines are gone from the face, the headaches that they were getting, the physical pains are starting to subside. Also, in people's voice; I do a lot of clients over the phone, and just to hear, “Hmmm….your voice sounds different. It sounds positive. It sounds excited. It sounds curious.”
So it's really enjoyable to have that experience, to have people that have these epiphanies and these a-ha situations on a fairly consistent basis. They just need to be regular with their journaling and they’ll get some surprising answers from the body's brain center.
Dealing with a life challenge maybe like “The Change”? Therapeutic Journaling helps you know what’s truly going on inside your ready-to-bloom body!
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