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Mari's #JournalingPower Blog

Honesty is Powerful

Posted by B. Lynn Goodwin on Tue, Jan 30, 2018 @ 07:30 AM

CreateWriteNow is pleased to host B. Lynn Goodwin and introduce her candid love story, 'Never Too Late: From Wannabe to Wife at 62', as part of her WOW-WomenOnWriting Blog Tour.

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“It’s discouraging to think how many people are shocked
by honesty and how few by deceit.”

– Noël Coward

Never Too Late - From Wannabe to Wife at 62 by author B. Lynn Goodwin.pngIn Never Too Late: From Wannabe to Wife at 62, I introduce readers to the most honest man I ever met, the man who would become my husband. We were sitting in his Mazda on the second date when he turned to me and said, “So you’ve never been married, right?

“Right.”

“Have you had boyfriends?”

“I’ve had friends that were men.”

As you can see in the dialogue above, taken from page 28 of the memoir, he’s eager to learn my history.  But how does a 62-year-old woman who’s never been married tell a potential boyfriend just how experienced she isn’t?  Yes, you read that correctly.  No, “isn’t” is not a typo.

I tried to be honest, but I hated being embarrassed.  I wasn’t going to say anything to drive him away.  As it turned out, I didn’t have to.  He knew just what to say to get to the truth.

“Exactly how close have you gotten to a man?”

He closes in on the truth with a confidence that comes from knowing that the secret to a successful relationship is no secrets.

I’m not going to tell you how I respond or what I say next.  You’ll need to read the book for that.  I will tell you, though, that the truth comes out in two more lines.  And it wasn’t bad or shameful or embarrassing. It was simply the truth.  His easy acceptance was a sensitive choice that I appreciated more than I can say.

Living my life without trying to figure out what statement might be an acceptable version of the truth is powerful.  I get to be myself, which has increased my confidence and my joy.  When squirmy moments come up, I tell the truth.  That keeps my side of the street clean.

How powerful is honesty? 

  • You never have to remember the lies you told.
  • Your conscience never bothers you.
  • You can get to the heart of matters . . . if you have the courage to do so.
  • Contentment replaces anxiety and fear.
  • Consistent honesty proves you can be trusted.
  • Trust often gives you more power with people you care about.
Never use honesty as a manipulative tool.  Use it to state the facts, and be open to other points of view. Stay open. Remain sensitive. Just because you have the confidence to be honest doesn’t mean that everyone else can do it . . . yet.

Honesty tempered with sensitivity frees you to be authentic.  It’s an incredibly sane and sensible way to lead your life, so if you find yourself avoiding the truth, stop it.  Face it.  Then move forward.  A whole new world awaits you.

B. Lynn Goodwin - Author.jpgAbout the Author

B. Lynn Goodwin owns Writer Advice.  Her memoir, Never Too Late: From Wannabe to Wife at 62 was just released by Koehler Press.

She's written You Want Me to Do WHAT? Journaling for Caregivers and Talent, which was short-listed for a Literary Lightbox Award, won a bronze medal in the Moonbeam Children’s Book Awards and was a finalist for a Sarton Women’s Book Award.

Goodwin’s work has appeared in Voices of Caregivers, Hip Mama, Dramatics Magazine, Inspire Me Today, The Sun, Good Housekeeping.com, Purple Clover.com and many other places.  She is a reviewer and teacher at Story Circle Network, and she is an editor, writer and manuscript coach at Writer Advice.

 

 

 

Topics: Living honestly, power of honesty

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