"Whether you think you can or you can’t, you’re right." – Henry Ford
This quote was my mantra throughout high school. I was fiercely driven to achieve, determined to rise above the family challenges I faced in my youth. I was on a mission to “make something of myself.” During that time, I truly believed that anything was possible if I focused on it with intention.
Yet, a decade later, I found myself lost. My ambitious drive had been overshadowed by the all-consuming responsibilities of caregiving for a disabled spouse who became volatile. The hope and excitement I once carried for the future had dimmed, replaced by despair. Life felt suffocating as I juggled full-time work and full-time caregiving in a toxic situation that left little room for dreams—or even basic self-care.
I couldn’t see a way out through the fog that had enveloped my life.
But then, on my 30th birthday, something shifted. A new decade brought with it a faint whisper of possibility—a chance for renewal. It was an invitation to imagine what could be.
I found my way back to a practice I had cherished in my youth: journaling. Armed with a crisp new journal adorned with inspiring travel photos, I let my pen flow freely, rekindling a long-dormant ability to dream. I began to visualize the life I longed for: breaking free from my toxic marriage, reconnecting with my love of dance, traveling the world, learning new languages, and rediscovering the parts of myself that had been set aside.
At first, it felt almost indulgent to dream so boldly. But I pressed on, allowing my pen to wander and my imagination to soar. I began mapping out travel itineraries, envisioning routes, researching destinations, and sketching a picture of the life I wanted to create. Making my childhood dream of visiting Paris a reality was always on the forefront of my imagination. And then, I let myself feel it as though it were real—the exhilaration, the freedom, the joy.
To my amazement, this simple act of visualization brought a renewed sense of energy and purpose. Amid the daily grind of caregiving, my journal became a lifeline, a refuge, and a source of inspiration.
Just three months later, I stood at the base of the Eiffel Tower, sipping champagne with my sister. It was surreal—a moment I had once only dared to imagine. Had I truly visualized my dreams into existence?
It turns out, I had.
As a lover of neuroscience, I was thrilled to discover that the science supports this phenomenon. Our brains cannot distinguish between vividly imagined experiences and reality. By visualizing a desired outcome, we begin laying the neurological groundwork to make it happen. My journal didn’t just capture my dreams; it became the tool that helped untangle me from the toxic web of my marriage and empowered me to chart a new course.
In the safety of my journal, I could admit truths I was too ashamed to speak aloud and imagine a future that seemed impossible. And with time, I began to live that future.
After my divorce, I found myself dancing around the globe, experiencing a new country through the lens of my dance training. I found love and healing as I reconnected with parts of myself that had been buried away. I documented each of my adventures, mishaps and “outside your comfort zone” experiences in a journal I acquired in my first post-separation trip to Australia. This travel journal is one of my prized possessions even today (so much so that it’s part of my “go-bag” should I ever have to leave my home in a hurry). Documenting each of my adventures reminded me of how far I had come and gave me motivation to keep growing.
Since then, my journaling practice has evolved in countless ways. Some journals are dedicated to gratitude, others to affirmations, intentions, or daily reflections. Each entry grounds me, helping me focus on what matters most while keeping me away from the distractions of endless scrolling.
Journaling has become my sanctuary—a source of hope, a record of my growth, and a reminder of the life I’ve lived. Each crossed-off goal or pivoted plan reflects the seasons of my journey. Through it all, my journals have provided me with clarity, renewal, and the courage to keep evolving.
So, what do you want to see more of in your life?
Write it down. Imagine it with all your senses. Believe it’s possible.
Because it truly can be.
Author Bio
Jenn Todling is an author, speaker, executive coach, as well as an adjunct instructor at the University of Denver as part of its Frontline Manager Leadership Program. Formerly an audit partner at a global Big 4 accounting firm with over twenty years of professional services experience and an ICF-certified transformational leadership coach for over ten years, Jenn helps her clients express their soul in their work and life. A lover of adventure, travel, and dance, she currently resides near her hometown of Boulder, Colorado, with her husband (and dance partner), and young daughter. Her debut memoir Dancing on My Own Two Feet will be available April 2025. Learn more at jenntodling.com.
Social media links:
Substack: Soul Spark with Jenn Todling
LinkedIn: Jenn Todling
Instagram: @jenntodling
Facebook : Jenn Todling - Author